Ahoy, it’s Smallcreep’s Day

Today Rome is excited because it is Smallcreep’s Day, a holiday that, as far as our researchers could determine, is only celebrated at Rome’s house. Listen to find out more about what Smallcreep’s Day is, and why you should join the celebration.

Other topics:

  • Goodbye hello, hello ahoy
  • Leap year
  • Why every four years is not leap year
  • Ken’s dealer
  • Text etiquette
  • Phil Collins update
  • Kirk Douglas
  • The War Wagon

 

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Episode 76: Cinco de If You’re Like Me-o

Heath returns from his trip to California, and he fills us in on his thrilling experiences.

Other topics discussed in this episode:

  • Uber adventures
  • Abba reunion
  • Avengers smash all records
  • Rome explains the infinity stones
  • Book reviews and recommendations
  • Probably the only discussion you will ever hear about Leo Tolstoy and NASCAR
  • Short celebrity death log

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Episode 73: Third Anniversary

This is a special third-anniversary episode of If You’re Like Me, with special guest star Scott Barr. We tell the story of how If You’re Like Me came to be, and discuss the following topics:

  • Daylight saving time
  • Listener Mail
  • The portrayal of small town people in movies
  • Impostor syndrome
  • Notable celebrity deaths
  • Update from Seattle
  • Portsmouth Update

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Episode 69: Seven days to #HollyJolly

This is an expert packed episode. Joining Joel and Rome are Jonathan Hyde, HR expert, and Jeff Fossett, cybersecurity expert.

Topics discussed in this episode:

  • Upcoming Fossett wedding
  • Punch
  • Andy Griffith Show
  • Christmas lights, and things for which they should have training classes
  • Jeff’s world famous key lime pie
  • Leaf blowing
  • Movies that are better than their books
  • Charlotte Douglas Airport and R&R
  • How to get a row to yourself on Southwest Airlines
  • Why are some songs considered Christmas songs?

 
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Five Minute Cannon: Country Blues

or, The Attack of the Farm Boy.

Just in time for Quinn Martin’s 95th birthday, we present an extended version of Five Minute Cannon. Famous country singer Woody Long is dead. Was foul play involved?

With Clu Gulager as BJ Long, Joan Van Ark as Diane, and Mark Hamill in a rare pre-Star Wars role as “Farm Boy.”

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5 Minute Cannon: The Seventh Grave

If You’re Like Me proudly presents a new feature: Five Minute Cannon. You have a busy life, all you can find is five minutes. Well, why not fill that five minutes with a recap of a thrilling episode of Cannon?

In this episode, Barry Nelson, Lou Frizzell, and unmentioned guest star Shelley Duval. It’s a portly powered pummelling of the perpetrator.

Episode 56: Two Year Special

It was two years ago this week that we started If You’re Like Me. It’s been a great two years, and in this episode, we look back at some of the original episode topics. We also discuss:

  • Herk Harvey’s lost film
  • Cannon update
  • Books
  • Judge Wapner
  • Tom Skerrit’s mustache
  • Rivers
  • Dreams
  • Rivers of Dreams

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Episode #52: Cream Cheese and Not-So-Tiny Tim

We are back at Due South Coffee Roasters for another Americola fueled episode.

In this episode:

  • Mayonnaise debate
  • Joel finally finishes his Smallcreep assignment
  • Joel runs Rome’s favorite Christmas movie, A Christmas Carol with not so Tiny Tim
  • We perform the annual recitation of the miracle of the Christmas Cream Cheese
  • Notable deaths give us an excuse to talk about some of our favorite Twilight Zone episodes, including Obsolete Man and The Mirror.
  • The Genesis reunion, sponsored by Polygrip

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Episode #51: We are thankful

It’s our annual Thanksgiving episode, and like last year, we list things for which we are thankful. That list does not include those terrible sappy Publix Thanksgiving commercials. This episode we are live at Due South Coffee Roasters in Taylors, South Carolina. If you are in the upstate of South Carolina, stop by Due South and have an Americola. You won’t regret it.

Other topics discussed on this episode:

  • Turkey, and why would anyone ever want to eat it
  • Review of the new McGyver series
  • Dr. Who, The Power of the Daleks
  • What happens next in Cannon: Murder by Gemini
  • Frankenstein, and what does he have to do with PBS’ Rick Steves
  • Rome’s interesting wife
  • Notable deaths, the master will not be pleased

Enjoy your turkey. You can have mine.

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Episode 49: You won’t believe what happens in this episode!

This episode is guaranteed to protect you in a Martian attack, as Rome explains what Slim Whitman has to do with progressive rock.

Other topics discussed:

  • Assembling Ikea furniture
  • Politics
  • Clickbait
  • Richard D. Trentlage
  • Jingles
  • Vincent Price
  • Kenny Roger’s retirement
  • Oxygen is getting depleted
  • Colossus and the Crab
  • The Sewell Family Vacation

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Episode 48: The Return of the Pumpkin Spice Candy Corn Flavored Circus Peanuts

In this episode:

  • Candy corn: what is it
  • Circus peanuts
  • Pumpkin spice everything
  • Rome’s bad week
  • San Francisco
  • iOS 10 and Joel’s favorite feature
  • Chuck Conners shoots somebody
  • Shark Tank
  • Bill Bixby’s pants
  • Lowe’s Foods calls batman
  • Cliff Hangers

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Episode 47: The BizarroPorch Mistery

On Labor Day 2016, Rome Maynard’s house was desecrated with a vicious BizarroPorch attack. If you or anyone you know have any information that could lead to the apprehension of the perpetrators, email rome@ifyourelike.me.

Additional topics in this episode:

  • Creepy clowns and how to avoid them
  • Apples, and why Rome hates them
  • Old guy glass
  • Mark Hamill’s unforgettable role as Farm Boy
  • Canoeing adventures
  • The Cannon literary cannon
  • Rome is the slowed down Johnny Carson
  • Bailey’s Beansicles
  • Celebrity deaths you may not have heard of

 

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Episode 45: Pokémon, Go Get Me Some Aspartame

In this episode, Joel asks Rome a series of burning questions, we play “Trump or DF Jones,” and a curmudgeonly old man explains Pokemon Go.

Other topics discussed:

  • Aspartame
  • Productivity
  • Rome’s superpower (wait for it…)
  • Recap of the political conventions
  • Morgan Freeman should narrate everything
  • Subscriptions, and how everybody wants our money
  • Celebrity death log
  • Television weathermen
  • The Fugitive (a Quinn Martin Production)
  • David Janssen’s pallbearers

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Episode 42: The Great Debate

In this episode, Shawn Tabor from Mundanity Podcast joins us to debate Rome on some very important topics:

  • Dr. Who
  • Batman
  • Stan Lee
  • What is the greatest comic book series of all time?

They don’t always see eye to eye, but the discussion has some surprises.

Also discussed on this episode:

  • What is Amazon recommending that we buy?
  • Random record reviews
  • Are celebrity obituaries overdone?
  • Wilford Brimley

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Episode #36: Reverse Larry and Middle-Aged Robin

It’s our podcast birthday! One year ago we set out on a mission to help others be more like us. Given the exploding popularity of Frank Cannon and Johnny Cash, it must be working.

In this episode we look back at the highs and lows of the first year of our podcast, Joel reviews 1949’s Chubby Batman and Middle-Aged Robin.

Rome reviews season one of CW’s The Flash. He explains why Harrison Wells may be his favorite television super villain.

We end the show with Joel giving Rome his annual performance review.

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Episode #35: Hello my name is Rhome

This episode marks the end of our first year of podcasting. In this Colossal episode:

  • Honathan Jyde shares how his life has changed since we endorsed him in episode 34.
  • Joel reviews the classic film Colossus: The Forbin Project
  • Rhome reviews the classic film A Face in the Crowd. Has his opinion of Andy Griffith changed?
  • 1949 Batman serial
  • 2016 Batman cereal (tastes like regret)
  • Driving in major cities
  • The future of medical imaging
  • Smokey voices
  • Rhome’s rhecent nhame chhange

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Episode 33: Rome Saves Tom Cruise Movies for Special Occasions

This episode was recorded during the great snowstorm of 2016.

We recap our assignments from last episode, and give each other new assignments. Joel’s assignment is to listen to the Alan Parson’s Project Tales of Mystery and Imagination: Edgar Alan Poe. Rome’s assignment is to partake of a delicious Mac and Cheese Taquito at QuikTrip.

We also pay our respects to the many famous people who have died since our last podcast:

  • David Bowie
  • Natalie Cole
  • Glenn Frey of the Eagles
  • Dan Haggerty, not of the Eagles
  • Alan Rickman

The death of David Bowie and Glenn Frey paint an interesting contrast between the critically acclaimed and the popular. We discuss if this applies to other areas of life.

For this week’s television recommendation, Rome recommends a return to the Metropolis of the 1950’s Adventures of Superman. a time of Truth, Justice, the American Way, and chubby superheroes.

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Episode 32: The Andy Grojak Show, or El Tiburón Verde

In this episode, Rome gives us a recommendation for a good episode of Kojak to get you through the dreary days of January. We review recommendations for actors to portray Kojak in a remake. Other topics:

  • Grace and Tony’s Phantasmagoric
  • Colossus by DF Jones
  • James Bond
  • Harry Houdini
  • The three best episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000

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Episode 31: A Very Slim New Year

It’s New Year’s Eve, and you probably want to know how to ring in the new year if you’re like us. In this episode, find out the best way to celebrate the new year. Topics discussed on this episode:

  • The best Christmas presents that Rome received in 2015
  • Rome’s Mexican wrestler names
  • A Cannon new year
  • What is Phil Collin’s dog’s name?
  • Our expert predictions for 2016

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If You’re Like Me Thanksgiving Special

turkey

It’s Thanksgiving, and if there is one word that sums up IYLM, it is “thankful.” On this episode we list items for which we are thankful. Joel gives a defense of mediocre music, Rome is wrong about Willie Nelson, and we introduce the first five nominees for our terrible Christmas song playlist.

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